Today, Pleasant little plans to stop by "The Other's" house this morning and crawl into his bed to wake him up ever so nicely passed through my head. It could have worked so nicely. I took the lovechild to school, I dropped "The One" off at work, I did my blooddraws and it was only 10ish. I had time, inclination, and the car.

I went to the house of one of my very pregnant friends this morning. She is adoribly pregnant and I brought her an adorable little gender neutral sleeper with a turtle on it and little booties to match. We sat on her couch and talked for probably an hour and a half to two hours. I am certain we would have kept talking all afternoon if she hadn't had an appointment to go to. I miss being able to see my friends when I spend a month or more ill with whatever virus is going around. Winters are hard that way.

"The One" feels like I am holding a stone wall up communication wise about something at the moment. I have been a bit moody lately, but I didn't think I was leaving him out, just trying to be nice by not tearing his throat out or anything. When I ponder it for a moment there are probably a lot of things I'm not saying, but it's not that I'm not saying them to him it's just a lot of minor things adding up. Things like my blood tests being off kilter enough that I'm not comfortable with them, not knowing what is causing this bad result, feeling overwhelmed with things I can't possibly accomplish on my own and feeling I'm not being helped with in the slightest, and that any work I do on the overwhelming things is unappreciated and sometimes downright laughed at. I also am feeling slightly overwhelmed by things I've brought upon myself, like the plans for Anniversary 2005 which are three quarters done with little to no ambition to finish it. I also feel horribly inadequate in a lot of the areas business wise. Perhaps there is a certain amount of Seasonal affect disorder happening to.

I learned how to play a star wars card game today. Not so difficult, but not so fun either. My lovechild started a character on City of Hero's. It's amazing how fast children can learn.

There was this boy at work today, who was in obvious need of a friend, just someone to sit and listen to him. So I did. I just sat there and let him rant at me about anything he could think of, and I let him be excited that someone was willing to just listen to him and think he was important. It's amazing how many people show up at my place of business with this particular need. It's amazing what listening will do for them. Like most of the people in our customer base he was socially inept. He reminded me so much of the way I was at that age, completely an outcast wanting to belong to even a group of geeks but sounding like a complete idiot and being insulted every time I opened my mouth. Oh, wait. . . I'm still that way.

I took the last of the pills that mess with my brain so badly this morning. I actually pitched the bottle across my car, thrilled that I wouldn't have to take the dizziness inducing chemicals of confusion anymore.

The other day as I was driving around with "The One" we noticed in a rather obscure location a lingerie shop. Our little town has been lacking one of these for as long as I can remember and I was thrilled at the idea of having sex toys available locally. During some spare time today I was going to stop in and support the local sex shop, you know let them know how happy I was that someone finally put one in our fair city, but when I pulled into the obscure parking lot in the obscure location there was a sign on the door facing the ally (did I mention the place was pretty obscure?) that stated the sex shop was no longer in business, after a moments silence for the loss of something I never really had, I realized that with the location it was rather obvious why the shop didn't last long. Oh well, it was an exciting thought.

So "The Other" has seemed rather non-interested in contact. Can't say as I blame what with being busy and wanting to sleep and all when he isn't too busy for said activity. I've been a bit overzealous in inviting him to do things when common sense tells me that he doesn't have the time or the inclination. I think perhaps he has seen too much of me lately and I need to lay off some, you know let him live his life and all.

For how early in the evening it is it's remarkable how tired I am. I think I'll call it an early night and catch up on some sleep myself.